Veterans Day

I am sitting in the back of US HST Class right now. We are watching the Mission, very early in our Native American unit. Why are we watching The Mission? It is a decent movie but the answer is we are watching the mission because I did nothing this weekend except drink, get drunk, eat steak and eggs, watch football, get drunker, then get even drunker.

All the other schools in Chicago have Veteran's Day off, and in our cantract it says that we have Veterans day off. However the Executive Director said that we are not using out instrucitonal time well, and that since Veterans Day technically falls on a Sunday that we did not get it off.

Only half our students showed up today, some of the louder ones are calling for a walkout third period, which I would be fine with since I planned on only half of them showing up anyway. I doubt that it will actually happen though.

I don't mind the fact that somedays I am a shitty teacher, because I know why I am and I know that it is all because of priorities and work, when I put in the work I am extraordiary, but right now I am just mildly hungover and very hungry. I am not tired and drinking because I am unhappy or struggling right now: Not in a sensitive starving aritst type way, not in a compassionate person suffering to see his students suffering and uses sarcastic anger and defiance to be a good teacher.

Right now I am just lazy, bored, and uncertain about my life. I still have flashes of anger and brilliance but on the whole I have lost my way. I am no longer exceptional or even noteworthy , just slowly blending in to the by and by of invisible teaching.

Unless...